How to Be Responsible

The only difference between being responsible and being irresponsible whittles down to two things: accountability and adaptability. A responsible person owns up to their role in any situation, and learns from their mistakes. An irresponsible person shifts the blame to someone or something else, and makes the same mistakes over and over again. Here are some steps you can take to become a more responsible person.

editSteps

1. 1
   Understand that responsibility is earned. It's not something you're entitled to. If someone is hesitant to give you additional responsibility, it's probably because you've been nonchalant with the responsibilities you already have. And you might think "But the responsibilities I have now are so petty/boring/etc., and if I'm given more of a challenge, I'll take it more seriously." But that's a classic characteristic of irresponsible people. They do things as long as they're challenging, fun, and new, and when that fades, they lose interest. A responsible person does what they said they'd do, because they said they would. Period. So if you want to be seen as more responsible, think about the responsibilities you already have, and take them more seriously, no matter how pointless they might seem. Consider it a way to pay your dues.

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2. 2
   Stop making excuses. In any situation, there are always some factors we can't control. Irresponsible people tend to shift the blame onto those factors, and vocalize them as excuses. Anytime you make an excuse, it's like saying "I am not responsible for this because..." and what you're really saying is "I am not responsible." Pay attention to how you think and talk--do you find yourself making excuses? Excuses come in many shapes and sizes, but the most common is "I would/would've, BUT..."
3. 3
   View yourself as a creator, not a victim, of circumstance. No one has complete control over how things turn out, but unless you're being forced to do something against your will, you still have a chance to influence the outcome. Many people who don't take responsibility for their lives see themselves as helpless, and their own efforts as futile. If this is how you feel, read up on How to Be Optimistic and How to Be Bold.
4. 4
   Overcome your fear of failure. When you take responsibility for something, it essentially means that you'll take the blame if it doesn't work out. So it's easy to fall back on the idea that if you don't take responsibility, you'll never fail. But the only way you can succeed is if you allow yourself to make mistakes that you can learn from. In other words, it's not the end of the world if you mess up! And if there's someone in your life who's making it seem that way, they're probably assigning you too much responsibility (perhaps so that they can shed some of their own).
5. 5
   Acknowledge your role. Whether something goes right or wrong, make it a point to announce your role in the situation to the people involved. If the dog peed on the carpet, and you ignored its whimpering and scratching at the door right before it happened, apologize to your parents or roommates. If the dog rolled over on command, and it's because you'd been training it for 20 minutes a day, say so! Don't be shy about admitting your mistakes as well as taking credit for your efforts. Not only will it reinforce your own sense of responsibility, but it will also gain respect (from anyone whose respect is worth getting).
6. 6
   Don't bite off more than you can chew. It's not responsible to make commitments that you probably can't keep, even if you really, really, really want to keep them. Sometimes saying "no" is the most responsible thing to do. If you have too much on your plate, learn how to say "no" andhow to delegate. If you're stretching yourself thin trying to keep everyone happy, you might also want to learn how to stop being a people pleaser. Either way, there is such a thing as taking on toomuch responsibility, and that is irresponsible in and of itself.

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editTips

• Always follow through. You'll struggle with losses of confidence and motivation along the way, and that's normal. The important thing is that you get back on course and finish what you start.

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